I am well. I know I haven’t been around much since my last post, but I can assure you it has nothing to do with my absence. I have been decorating and decluttering my house, believe it or not. It has been exhausting, but also uplifting. I am one of those people who clutter my life with things I don’t need, and now I don’t want. So I have opened a Vinted account, and I am selling everything. I have had enough of carrying it, tripping over it, and most importantly, pushing it into a corner and telling myself I’ll deal with it later. So, it’s going. Hopefully, to a new home and with someone who’ll make use of it.
I have had this building-hoarding mentality over the years, tightly wound around notions of ‘sentimental tokens’ and ‘what ifs’.
“Oh, I remember this! It reminds me of this,” or “Oh my god! Do you remember when we went here and did this?”
Yeah, we’ve all done it. The only issue is we don’t need these trinkets to remind us we’re alive or that we lived. You know what I mean?
Memory is a luxury we take for granted, and as we get older, memories fade and change, so I understand why we keep ‘tokens’ of our time here on Earth, but the truth is, ‘Who are you keeping these trinkets for?’ If something were to happen to me tomorrow, what would I be leaving my daughter behind?
Shit, that’s what. I ain’t going to sugar coat it, I’d be leaving her with a house full of my memories and my junk. Debt and a bank account she wouldn’t be able to access. I don’t want that.
When I leave her, all I want her to have is great memories and a wealth of knowledge.
Why do our memories have to be tied to objects?
Memories can be made together and stored in a photo or a recording rather than objects, just like we used to do back in the day. My parents constantly took photos of us as we were growing up. I did the same with my children as they grew up. This is all that is needed for ‘tokens’ of our time here, not all the other bullshit.
There is no room in my life for junk anymore. I want to leave my daughter (one day in the future) with happy memories, knowledge, and, again, without sugarcoating it, wealth. I want to make sure she is secure in life. That’s my goal, anyway, and I know I’m not going to make millions selling my stuff, lol. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m just saying I am in the mindset now that I probably should have been in a while ago, and I was at one point, but when I’d lost myself, it sort of went on the back burner. Not anymore. I’ve moved it to the front, and it’s hot!
I am getting rid of the clutter and possibly my house too, fuck it! You only live once, right? I am only me once. I’m going to minimise everything. Maybe buy some land, live off it, who knows. Maybe leave the country altogether, go somewhere else. It’s a plan, isn’t it?
If you’re having the same kind of apiphant as me, awesome! I’m sending you love and support in this scary, but exciting time.
This country is going to shit, and I don’t think I wanna be a part of it anymore. I know there are a lot of people in the UK right now who feel the same. It doesn’t matter what side of the fence you’re on; we’re all affected by it.
Anyway, have an awesome day. I hope this finds you well, and I hope you have a great day.
Ellie <3
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